Why Sleep Feels So Hard—And What to Do First

Let’s Start With the Real Talk

You’re exhausted. You’ve tried Google, Instagram hacks, and maybe even that one tip from your cousin’s neighbor who "swears it worked."

And still—bedtime is a mess. Naps are unpredictable. Your child won't fall asleep without you. And frankly? You’re running on fumes.

Let us start by saying: You’re not doing anything wrong.

Sleep isn’t always easy. But it is teachable. And when it feels impossible, it usually means we’ve skipped over the foundations. That’s why this month, we’re getting back to basics.

The 3 Foundations of Better Sleep

1. A Consistent Bedtime Routine

Think of a bedtime routine like your child’s sleep signal. When you do the same steps, in the same order, at the same time each night, you’re literally programming their brain to wind down.

Even a simple 15-20 minute routine can:

• Reduce resistance

• Calm the nervous system

• Cue melatonin (the sleep hormone)

• Provide a sense of safety and predictability

Pro Tip: Start the routine 15 minutes earlier than you think you need to. An overtired child has a harder time falling (and staying) asleep.

2. Independent Sleep Skills

It’s okay if your child needs you sometimes. But if they rely on you every single time they fall asleep (rocking, feeding, laying with them), then they haven’t yet built independent sleep skills.

Teaching your child how to fall asleep on their own doesn’t mean abandoning them. It means supporting them as they learn a new skill.

And the truth? Children who can fall asleep independently are more likely to:

• Sleep longer stretches at night

• Transition between cycles without waking fully

• Develop a healthy, secure sleep foundation

3. Realistic Expectations by Age

One of the most frustrating things about sleep is that it constantly changes. What worked at 4 months may not work at 14 months. That’s why understanding your child’s age-specific needs is critical.

Ask yourself:

• Is my child on an age-appropriate schedule?

• Are they getting enough day sleep to support night sleep?

• Are wake windows being respected?

Sometimes, sleep challenges come down to small tweaks in timing—not big overhauls.

What NOT to Do

Let’s save you some time (and sanity):

❌ Don’t jump from method to method each night. Consistency is key.

❌ Don’t assume crying = failure. Some protest is normal.

❌ Don’t ignore sleep cues just to "stick to the schedule."

So… Where Should You Start?

Start with clarity.

We created a totally free tool called the Start Here Sleep Map to help you figure out exactly what your child needs most right now.

Take the 2-minute quiz, and we’ll point you to the right strategy, the right resource, and the right next step.

📅 Want personalized support?

Book a Sleep Evaluation Call with our team. We’ll look at your child’s sleep from every angle and build a plan that actually works.

💾 Want a free tool?

Download our Sleep Teaching Starter Guide to put the foundations in place tonight.

You don’t need to do it all at once. But you do need to start.

We’re here to help.